ok so its got mad good colors. Its got wide mouths so u can drink lots of gulps without breathing (no sense waisting breath when u tryin to get all engerized and healthy and what not). And above all its got ELEXOFLEXOTIGHTLYTES... thats short for electrolytes.
an electrolyte is any substance containing free ions that make the substance electrically conductive.
aka its a chemical that makes u electric.
Fuck yeah
For forty years ive been thinkin damn im so good at soccer... wait every single god damn sport. why am i so good at sports... wait every single god damn physical activity i participate in... wait, shit im even good at thinkin.
and now i know what the deal is, im electric. Im like a fuckin lightning bolt. I can light up ur night baby. i can burn u to a crisp shit, i can even split a tree which sways back and forth at the edge of a cliff very dramatically with only my bare hand and its all cuz i drink gatorade. (fuck i hope they hire me as their spokesman)
hmmm the logo seems to suggest gatorade might have been keen to this whole lightning metaphor.
p.s. if u know what a troglodyte is, ur a nerd
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