Sunday, December 27, 2009

Friday, December 25, 2009

jesus is the reason for the season.

having beef with the extended fam leads to going out for indian on christmas eve. every jewish family or broken home divorce fam in the county was there too. christmas is weird, it kind of feels like too big of a deal is made over presents and shit. lexus ads with a fucking gs wrapped in a bow creep me out, like christmas is an epic occaision to buy shit. and anyone who talks about the joy of giving is full of shit, there is a proven ratio between amount of effort put into a gift, and how little it will be appreciated relative to that effort.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

MiDniGht MASS... hysteria

MAN am i psyched... not for self-indulgent present giving and the ruse of xmas cheer spurred on by greed, ugliness, and hopeless lives filled with false spirituality... but instead for midnight mass

The National Shrine of Our Lady of Czestochowa is the spot (DToWn). At all times you will find some sparkling young biddies in their LBDs ready to whip u something good if u step outta line, and on xmas eve an even bigger party gets started.

People flock to this joint at 12 oclock (like i will be doing tonite) in order to sing, kiss eachother, drink blood, listen to european techno (honestly thats what a polish homily sounds like), and praise the BlaCk MAdonNa. Fuck yeah we got a black one. Just goes to show the polish know whats good and can throw a party like the best of em.

im prob gonna hit up the cemetery before hand, knock a couple back and get my blessin on...

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

try sleeping with a broken heart

IM tots bored right now blogging from the bath. should i huff the spray paint that is in the bathroom? this song is too good.

sports bars are the funnest places everz. theres all these nerds from high school, and people who care way too much about the giants. i wish i knew of any dive bars, but unfortunately best buy had this special rebate for bar owners (publicans) on flat screen tvs. if you bought 20 or more you got like a million %%%% off, kinda crazy. now every bar has like 400>9 tvs all with college basketball or the giants, neither of which i give a fuck about. I wish all the people except my friends would leave and we could watch south park, or maybe a movie on hbo. im not sure if bars have a discount on hbo.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Half ur bAlls = HAlf a MAn

So i was thinking... it was prob cuz of brits def that i began to think (life is so temporal RIPPPPP my blondebomb of lips and overacting)... that if i lost one of my balls i would lose half my soul.

What are you with one ball except halfway to becoming a eunuch
I dont ever wanna be a eunuch they are neither man nor woman but only slaves to humanity...

I was told of a viking that only had one ball... Many people think vikings are weathered, brawny men but unfortunately the woman having sex with this man found it hard (yeah she did) and uncomfortable and like having sex with a woman ... because he only had one ball... not two

This guys a Eunuch and he prob is really sad about brit murfs def ... rough life

Saturday, December 19, 2009

pURpPle PteRr0DacKtyIles

Crushing ski city all day yestersday and today. On Thursday i stormed fort. Ti(conderoga) literally. hiked to it mad coldness and shit. then i had ot wait in this little shitcabin because whateevr. i learned that public transport is only to be used in new york city or by people who dont have cars. if you have a car there is no reason to ever use public transport. amtrak is guaranteed to be inefficient and shitty and frustrating. its a fucking joke, the fort ti station needs to get somehting like heat, or a vending machine or anything. i love upstate but sometimes desolation status is just too much for me. there is nothing around but poverty and coldness

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

ReAl TAlk

Everybody tries to real talk... some people are more successful than others...
-when a nerd real talks it proves what a big nerd she is,
    it just sounds like whining and complaining and bitch talk... not real talk
-when i real talk i real talk about real talk not real life...
    nerds dont understand that real talk is more real than real life
    nothing in real life matters especially not your silly math and science books loser (if i got the chance and
   was walking behind u, and you were carrying a bunch of books in ur arms, like BLAM, id smack dat shit   
   and theyd be splayed out all over the floor


dat asshole is distracting all those chillers trying to have a drink... what a fuckin nerd

Sunday, December 13, 2009

that looks like a place i really dont want to be


theres an obese retarded guy and his brother who is really messed up.

or else you whorres would have seen my pen15





Screenshots from this ill horror b movie that cooper is watching. its called faces of deathpipez volume XXXVII

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Gossip girl review a little late

at this point i am completely confused between the OC and gossip girl. Serena and marissa are the exact same character. (hotness aside) Theyre both the slightly more aloof, blonde one, who has all kinds of fucked up family problems, and responds by making all of the worst decisions in the world. seriously like in writing this show they must come up with a situation, then have serena/marissa do whatever the most self destructive and stupid thing is. Summer/blair has her own problems, but they are always ignorant shit, like being the boss of the high school, not like marissa/serena whose problems include forbiddden romance, drink/drugs, car crashes, etc. I'm tots down with the playing of pop-rap/rnb on gossipgurlcity.org. (anyone remember the OC with TI performing bring em out?)

Chuck Bass was kind of a vag, lets hope that doesnt happen again.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

phiggyour itt owwt four yorecelph

the "young bloods" be growing up and shit
gawd gawd
yoo so kraszie
all respawnsibyl
its WEIRD
see each other once a week
weeyerd
such bullshyt
sewwwww weeeeyyeerrdd
phuq1
scuse me
i think i broke my ankle
howwwe
my friend was being mega silly
oh jeeez
and smushed my ankle into a bar thing
its veddy veddy black and blue
that doesnt sound silly it sounds violnt
and swollenpipez
"my friend was being silly and smashed me with a golf club"
and swollenpipez

Sunday, December 6, 2009

who woulda guessed it... miley's a sLutTt

OH No everyone's fav, crossover, superstar, (seriously) guilty pleasure has been tainted by the mark of the devil. Let me just use this moment of mourning to expound upon the awful parenting that papa mullet has done. He has allowed his little nugget of gold and semen be mined (and likely drilled) thus making a lot of money so that he doesnt have to make country christian crap anymore... which now that i think about it makes miley something of an angel, or at least until she got stamped under the titty. Billy Gay was only popular cause he brilliantly rhymed achy with breaky and had a terrible stylist. And let me also note that there was likely some foul play involved if a seventeen year old can get a tattoo under her titty... shit probably old man billy willy daughterfucker held up her tit while she got it done.

also check out the creepster scoping out some scandalous seventeen year old booty.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

KILLA SEASON MEeTS HOUSeGUEST


If this is serious and CAm is making a bad houseguest themed comedy, i am thrilled.Cam is easily the funniest person in the music business, and way funnier than most people in entertainment. WHat he really deserves is for some [good] filmmaker(and/or tv comedy person) to get on his dick (in the way tarantino/jarmusch have slobbered on rza's dick [no homo])Being largely ignorant, i don't know who is good enough at comedy to work with cam, but i could see a larry david colaboration.(like i give a fuck how colaboration is spelled) I suppose it would be diff. because cam wouldnt be doing the music he would be writing, but whatev he is good at words.

Footage of Tiger and his [fueg] wife fighting.


XXXcluSIvez

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

g0sSiP GirLL

After the crushing disappointment of last week no NEw EpSIODE! I was 0mega PumPed for this week. The set up for the pivotal dinner was absurd. WHy would soooso many rich and powerful and/or famous people who are all beautiful have nothing to do. the fact that it is thanksgiving is irrelevant. The dinner itself was a monstrosity. the only people who came out of it not looking like douschbaAAGS were 1. Rufus: such a nice guy. 2. CHuck Bass: Nietzschean overman. 3. Serenas hot mom's mother (not as hot as her[serena's] mom) 4. Kind of Blair and her mother: it is weird how blair waldorf's drama is so meaningless.

talking points: serena, slute, totally. mayor or whatevr, creep, nerd. nate, weak ass bitch got punked out by a nerd. vanessas's mom, lame character, pointless.

Amazing r0mance between UNattractIVe foreign servants (russian or somehting, should have g0tten a hot one ) *servants in uniform in a private house is so absurd, that for a minute i thought they had slaves.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

In a world of ignorance I am enlightenment

Fuck wit dat FYSEM

You a FoOOL if u aint seen dis shit

FOOL's GOLD mother fuckers... thats where its at ... its all about the romantic comedies these days... u take a woman or 2 if ur french or 3 if u have a baller blog and then u get ur dick sucked at the movie theatre while some hot chick poses/exposes in a swimsuit on a mega big awesome screen...
i love dis crack shit... Alexis Dziena is the crackest

yeah she be makin dat O face when i unsheathe my s word too

You Built a big rape-monster


Gay-rape, g-rape, grape. Sparkling GrApE

Thursday, November 26, 2009

thanks for everything

thanksgiving is the best. its my fav holiday, its all about delicious foods and laying about doing fuck all. I listened to a vampire weekend song about mexican sugar water but it s'ed mad dixxx. Its easy to be bored and tired and full on thanksgiving. There will be only the brief respite of bathing and reading, before i finally settle into sleep, which is of course the best part of family holidays, next to eating.

Russell Means. Find OUt.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

IGnoRanttttt CITYAAAaaaaa

i like baller shit... like beer pong and crazy bull shit

i live in a world full of elitist ass holes that are awesome

the only way to entertain these fuckers is with four tvs playing wrestling and and skateboarding...
that kinda rocks but whatev cause we play smash and thats the end of the story

fuck 24 hours fuck ur shit fuck blogging

I was scared of everything she did to me

sometimes you just wanna go to sleep, but propriety dictates that you not.

Monday, November 23, 2009

birthdays, sunsets, and how people live in the world

Today was a day to reflect on life. A day to contemplate what it means to be old enough to legally buy beer. A day to not actually buy any beer. A day to walk on bridges and drink mexican sugar water crack. A day to smash to pieces preconcieved notions of what would happen if you left the keys in the door of your car for an hour in the hood[dreams] A day to get ready for tomorrow. Tomorrow which holds new and mysterious things in store.

coming soon will be a truly scandalous home video of the birthday festivities, not to mention GOSSIP GUrl.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

tres gangster at liberal arts school

the other day i went to this private liberal arts school of great renown. I went for a little visit. It's in this gangster squared little city on the hudson, where all the trapmusic of the chariot del fueg felt appropriate. At this school havoc was wrought upon the campus, with numerous coeds being accosted and the locations of parties being demanded of them.

googlepedia.tv
vampireofthefuture.com
whatspoppin.net

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

19 hours deep live blogging

powerful warriors we are, this has not been difficult whatsoever

ARab DRIFTING

This is what all the cool saudi dudes do.

wicker man now, were onto movie number 4. so far soul plane ignorant, aguirre eye hurtingly good, hangover complete shit

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

LIVE BLOGGING 24 hours of glory

WHats yoUR name?
ELvis HUngKey
Into MOvie 1 getTing poWER CAPTAIN MACK.

g0sSiP gIrL reviEW

Follow up on the threesome was a good deal more fueg. Hillary DUfff was all kinds of icy, turning all manipulative and gangster. Maybe the most interesting development is Jenny from the block getting down with some kind of big deal foreigner who sells ecstasy, but he seemed like a mad pussy drug dealer. Chuck BAss saved the day, but then she tots went behind his back and was all "lets party" with the foreigner. Serena is a humongious SLute. nate thought he was all up in that shit but then like his cousin the mayor got in it.

Monday, November 16, 2009

aNd iFf U donT kNo nOW u KnO




Allston probably has the greatest density of worthwhile snacks. in 6 hours separate journeys were made for pizza, wings, dunkin donuts, ice cream. the whole gamut of ethnic foods, bodega, burger, pizza, anything really. ALmost all for take out. 


slick rick pretty much killed it.






Saturday, November 14, 2009

MOVIN THE SOLAR PANEL













live in boston, slick rick tonight
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHAAAAHHHH

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

VETERAN;s DAY for A-DAM cock


MUCH LOVE towards alabama and worldwide

hAvE u eVeR liVed tHiS biGG?

gourski: "yew kant poool 2 hard dood!"
z. khalil: "you got to put your pinky up your bum then take your thumb off the carb and take a nice deep hit"
Why doesnt anyone make music as good as east coast 90s rap anymore? AllDAY supersmash and BIg L

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

KeEPinG the BaBY is for BitChES!!!

knocked up sucks....
i hate this movie
anyone with taste should be disgusted by the horrible morals it promotes
and the depressing situation it makes light of

POMPOMPOMPOM !!!?!?!?!

japan is sooo hip right now

whats the hippest part of japan... fuckin raccoons
raccoons with big testicles they use to shapeshift and attack humans

i love japan... but god damnit do i hate environmentalism


Jeopardy and why i run game at that shit

i basicly own all forms of trivia. cash cab is obvi not a problem, but jeopardy, which many poeple would find challenging, i also dominate.

GOSSSSIP GIRL review

i was tantalized by the prospect of a sexy-time 3way action betwixt some slamming gossip fools. Probably number one for sexiness obvi would be blair serena and chuck bass. a possible substitute would be jenny humphrey for any one of them. COMPLETELY inappropriate is the combination of the three worst characters on the show


Otherwise Jenny from the block fucking raped that cotillion shit, totally clowning even blair fucking waldorf. Chuck Bass continues to be the moral center of the show which is fucking ridiculous.

Monday, November 9, 2009

g0sSiP GIIRll t0NigHT

soooooooooo pumped. had to miss lat week because of the dominance of the most glorious men in sports/the world. got a fucking huge dunkacchhino thats tots awesome but reelly hot. Everyone has an opinion on gossip girl, its mad epic, it touches people's lives and i dont think they relly understand how. 



Blair Waldorf is mad fueg. her and serena and miley and t.swift are the most fueg out right now.

ANImal HoOf!!!

Everyhipsters favorite bestial conglomeration is releasing a new ep and mass hysteria is expected...
Nov. 23rd

Tracklist:
1 - Graze
2 - What Would I Want? Sky
3 - Bleed
4 - On a Highway
5 - I Think I Can

the ignorance is propelled by the first ever licensed grateful dead sample on the second track...
Im plannin a great big car trip bake out sesh while drivin to jerrys grave and watchin halfbaked gnarly dude...

Sunday, November 8, 2009

EmMA wAtSoN


lolz, omg im dying right now, but no really thats fine.

THeRes a SHEWOLF in my ... pussy?

saw shakira in da club the other night ... and yes she does actually dance like that around real people.

she also named some of her groundbreaking moves
The one in which she swings her arms rapidly back and forth in front of her, she calls that the ladies favorite... the salad tosser...
and then when she archs her back and bends over backwards towards the floor while pretending to hug a huge cock, that ones the backward cum guzzler.

more from shakiras #1 fan after i get my hands out of my pants
Current gangsterest jam out.
Pill-Trap Goin Ham



Current fueg jam
david guetta ft. akon sexy bitch

CANON

we came up with a list of movies. a canon of all important films, which we will watch in one sitting. sort of.

in order:

Soul Plane
Aguirre
The Hangover
Wicker Man (remake)
clockers
paprika
walker
shadow of the vampire
salo 120 days of sodom
Alice
Breakfast at Tiffany's
JCVD
Hook
Cheech and Chong Corsican brothers
Jackie Brown
Superfly
Gomorrah
SweetSweetback's Badassss song
Chandi Chowk to China
Kung Pow
Varsity Blues
DEBS
Beyond the Thunderdome
Run Lola Run
Killa Season

Friday, November 6, 2009

SWINEblockas

is that how it should be spelled? look out for the remix feat. OJ da Juiceman and terrance howard

did you realize?



That you are a champion in their eyes?

beauty and power

rEaL tALk


wheres my dip? 
music for powering through swine. something about mars attacks.

STRAight fueeggg

SWINEBLOCKERS PT. II: HUFFLEPUFF

whos in hufflepuff.

SWINEBLOCKERS

most likely to get swine walk...nickkkk gorrssskkkkiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii