Tuesday, February 1, 2011
NSFW Kacey Jordan, Crack, Charlie Sheen, Nude Pics, MIley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, Brett Favre Penis Rehab,
The secret to getting more blog hits is posting naked pictures of famous women. I only realized this when I saw that the post from last year about ALExis Dziena was far and away the most viewed ever. then i saw that the exact google search terms that refferred the greatest number of people to the blog were "alexis dziena nude" From here on out i think it is important that this blog no longer bullshit about feelings, music, sports, any of that nonsense. just buzzwords like naked pics, demi lovato, miley cyrus, lindsay lohan, jWoWW, etc. the exception would of course be brett favre and his penis, which combines sport and famous nudity.
"I cant believe how popular i can make a blog LOLZ"
top left: "dam u have a stupid hat"
RiPPPEd
love/hate me some jersey shore
Blogs are all about popularity. need to be higher up on google image search.
"I cant believe how popular i can make a blog LOLZ"
top left: "dam u have a stupid hat"
RiPPPEd
love/hate me some jersey shore
Blogs are all about popularity. need to be higher up on google image search.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
PUTDATEAMONMYBACK
Commentators are so fucking bad
Instead of all those clowns fucking around at their big desk, wearing suits and shit like they have a real job, it should be more like this. especially football with its numerous and long lulls (lulz?) in actual shit happening. they just fill up the time with meaningless talk that they probably think sounds knowledgable. "in this kind of situation it would be less advantageous to have a negative gain circumstance for the offense of the green bay packers" some kind of really convoluted statement that probably didnt need to be made. My favorite commentator of all sports is probably ANdy Gray
he really is good though. in regards to a cristiano ronaldo blatant dive "he went down like he was shot by a sniper" the thing about women linesmen is kind of funny. i feel bad they got fired or whatever.
Music Wurd Joaks
I have two cute kitty cats and two old dogs at home. The one cat is so special she jumps up on the book shelf using her Cat power. She is really Feisty. They all get along so well I think that they have formed an Animal collective. maybe they will invite a Caribou to join.
ON a serious note though, I really think Charlie Sheen kills it.
it makes sense that he is on a show as dumb as 2.5 men. he is probably mad effed up all the time, and totally fucking hungover. I have never really seen more than 3 minutes of 2.5 men, and i dont know anything about acting. as far as i can tell acting on sitcoms doesnt have to be good, people sort of just shoot off dumb jokes. some more serious sitcoms like ones from england, or conceptual things like arrested development, those require some acting maybe. but again i dont really know. Either way Charlie (real name Carlos estevez) Sheen is hilarious. he and his bro EMILIO should make a movie. about why seinfeld blows.
ON a serious note though, I really think Charlie Sheen kills it.
it makes sense that he is on a show as dumb as 2.5 men. he is probably mad effed up all the time, and totally fucking hungover. I have never really seen more than 3 minutes of 2.5 men, and i dont know anything about acting. as far as i can tell acting on sitcoms doesnt have to be good, people sort of just shoot off dumb jokes. some more serious sitcoms like ones from england, or conceptual things like arrested development, those require some acting maybe. but again i dont really know. Either way Charlie (real name Carlos estevez) Sheen is hilarious. he and his bro EMILIO should make a movie. about why seinfeld blows.
Friday, January 28, 2011
NSFW watchin porn NSFW
saw the funniest ad while watching porn today...
"my dick is now 10" long! I dont give a shit about anything...I just FUCK women all day. every day." (Note: they said woman rather then women, quite barbaric)
no homo
see
kinda feel like thats an exaggeration. Not necessarily the size of the dick cuz it does look like a big dick but the fact that he doesnt do anything but fuck. ANd if this were true kinda feel like id be kinda bummed. like u know how green day has that song that everyone use to listen to in elementary school and they say "masturbation's lost its fun" (totes never thought that could happen as a kid. Totes thought they were just crazy pop punkers trying to be all rebellious and just say things like masturbation and fun.) but kinda think now that im becoming... whats it called... ma...ture??? or something, and i realize u cant just masturbate all day.
probs feel like if u fuck all day ur dick might start to hurt and u might wanna do something else like eat and shit .
feel like a 10 inch dick prob makes chick not want to fuck all day too. cuz their vag prob gets all tired.
prob most importantly though, just a reminder to all my bros out there, even without a 10 inch dick... u dont have to give a shit about anything
"my dick is now 10" long! I dont give a shit about anything...I just FUCK women all day. every day." (Note: they said woman rather then women, quite barbaric)
no homo
see
kinda feel like thats an exaggeration. Not necessarily the size of the dick cuz it does look like a big dick but the fact that he doesnt do anything but fuck. ANd if this were true kinda feel like id be kinda bummed. like u know how green day has that song that everyone use to listen to in elementary school and they say "masturbation's lost its fun" (totes never thought that could happen as a kid. Totes thought they were just crazy pop punkers trying to be all rebellious and just say things like masturbation and fun.) but kinda think now that im becoming... whats it called... ma...ture??? or something, and i realize u cant just masturbate all day.
probs feel like if u fuck all day ur dick might start to hurt and u might wanna do something else like eat and shit .
feel like a 10 inch dick prob makes chick not want to fuck all day too. cuz their vag prob gets all tired.
prob most importantly though, just a reminder to all my bros out there, even without a 10 inch dick... u dont have to give a shit about anything
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
as antony said to cleopatra as he opened a crate of ale oh i say....
instead of bitching about one's parents and shit like "quit nagging at me". "I'M a disappointment? what have you ever done?" "I'M lazy!?" "would you ever fuck off?" "You advised me poorly mom and dad"its time to get real. i think hating your parents is for lamestreamers and baby boomers (baby boomers are lamestreamers, but lamestreamers need not be baby boomers.) nope, the person who it is more authentic to hate than your parents is yourself. sure you can blame them for your own shortcomings (genetics, learned behavior, lifestyle, etc.) but in the end it is still you who is the disappointment. you are the one who has failed to match them. (unless you have. i scarcely think i know anyone who qualifies for that though, and those people make me feel bad bout myself so lets ignore them) i hate them for setting the bar high and judging me, but i hate myself for failing to best them. i suppose it might be time to give in and conform to a more mainstream lifestyle, free from ultraviolence and misery.
encyclopedia dramatica, my new wikipedia
encyclopedia dramatica, my new wikipedia
I eFfin Hate white people.
this fool i know once told me that ^ while midst the throes of near absolute inebriation (meaning his blood had basically become alcohol). At that point i argued with him awhile about what exactly a house is and how a person actually comes to have one. Althouhg that may sound inconsequential, its importance is paramount in any mind flooded with crooked I's.
Yet despite this unnamed american indian's adroitly persuasive arguments... not until recently have i come to finally agree with the aforementioned statement.
most things white poeple love suck. Flat out. Like tom brady and country music and romance and being all tentious and shit
unpaid internships are the dumbest things ever - a white creation implemented to make their white mature society of business and bureaucracy more exclusive and illogical. If somebody has an internship to learn about working, why do they gots to go to college, because aint that shit spose to prepare u for work or somethin like dat.
white people (specifically mature white people) also suck at enjoying life. For evidence see the following -
Fun things: dancing, singing, laughing/tellin jokes, boxing, smokin blunts, drinkin forties, chillin, playin sports, listening to good music, wearing cool clothes, being friendly, not being a stuck up priss
and all things mature white people dont do or straight up suck at
I think as long as u dont become a mature white person u might be safe from becoming a bland, robotic tool that old greedy ugly white people control and manipulate... but if u do... ur fuckin screwed
Audio Visual Support for why white people suck.
Yet despite this unnamed american indian's adroitly persuasive arguments... not until recently have i come to finally agree with the aforementioned statement.
most things white poeple love suck. Flat out. Like tom brady and country music and romance and being all tentious and shit
unpaid internships are the dumbest things ever - a white creation implemented to make their white mature society of business and bureaucracy more exclusive and illogical. If somebody has an internship to learn about working, why do they gots to go to college, because aint that shit spose to prepare u for work or somethin like dat.
white people (specifically mature white people) also suck at enjoying life. For evidence see the following -
Fun things: dancing, singing, laughing/tellin jokes, boxing, smokin blunts, drinkin forties, chillin, playin sports, listening to good music, wearing cool clothes, being friendly, not being a stuck up priss
and all things mature white people dont do or straight up suck at
I think as long as u dont become a mature white person u might be safe from becoming a bland, robotic tool that old greedy ugly white people control and manipulate... but if u do... ur fuckin screwed
Audio Visual Support for why white people suck.
Monday, January 24, 2011
the harvest is past the summer is ended and we are not saved
i have no money. that means i have enough money for gas, drinking, going out for pizza, my cell phone. and nothing else. i dont understand where other people get things. maybe they drink/smoke less than me. how can other people afford shit? i dont pay rent. if i had rent/mortgage i would never have any money. i think a decent standard of living, with morally responsible food, vacation and clothing purchases requires an income of easily 100k and up. if you want to live in a place with decent restaurants and shit, and ready access to clothing stores, that isnt a dirty city, you are f-d. shit is tough. some people i know have jobs and shit. like real ones. im pretty jealous. would totally love a crib w/o my parents. i hate dogs. we have 2. hate the lifestyle of blount rides. hate my parents.
i feel like many people had these feelings in high school. maybe now they love their parents? maybe they are more mature than me. idk. i feel like i need to attend the hater's ball. hate hate hate. its not just jealousy motivated though. some of it is also scornful. resent people whose lifestyle choices i find callous or immoral. (most of these people coincidentally have nicer cars than me)
i feel like many people had these feelings in high school. maybe now they love their parents? maybe they are more mature than me. idk. i feel like i need to attend the hater's ball. hate hate hate. its not just jealousy motivated though. some of it is also scornful. resent people whose lifestyle choices i find callous or immoral. (most of these people coincidentally have nicer cars than me)
| Chappelles Show | ||||
| The Playa Hater's Ball | ||||
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